Motivating

Employee perks: Who should get them?

On May 3, 2012 / Graceful Leadership, Leading, Motivating / 6 Comments

These two find their own ways to enjoy the home office. Grace and Dodger love sunbeams from either side of the door and I can get my work done easily while they are nearby. But it's not that simple at most places of business.

This post isn’t about whether you should allow dogs in the office. But it’s an excellent example of the types of tough decisions a manager has to make when balancing employee perks and the demands of a job.

When I made my customary stop at the dry cleaners on Tuesday morning, there were no dogs there. The atmosphere was drastically different than the place I had become accustomed to.

The woman who cheerfully and efficiently greets me each visit always has her sidekick with her, a tiny Yorkshire Terrier, named Athena. Athena is quiet and well-mannered, friendly but not overbearing. On occasion, I’ve had to be careful not to trip over her as I enter or leave, but she’s never truly in the way and I like the warmth that it adds to a mundane errand I run.

I’ve watched many a customer dote over this little puffball of fur and observed Athena’s mom just beam with pride. There are always animated conversations that involve Athena; it’s a happy place, full of life. (In fact, I’m just now realizing that I know the dog’s name, but not the employee’s name!) Last week, Athena had company — a newly adopted, gorgeous 9-week-old Australian shepherd, and even I, a dog-lover, wondered how anyone could focus on their job and watch a puppy. Yet I was so taken with P.J.’s beauty and how incredibly well-behaved he was, it didn’t strike me as an issue.

This week, expecting to see the playful pup, I opened the door and was met with stark quiet, a most obvious emptiness that was foreign to my experiences there. The employee wore a smile, but something was different. I immediately asked about the dogs, and with just the tiniest hint of a somber mood and astonishingly absent of any bitterness, she explained that the owner felt the shedding of dog hair in a dry cleaning business wasn’t going to work anymore. It made me wonder what the complete story was, and I’m sure I’ll never know. It’s likely there were many factors, and also as likely that it may have been the best decision for the business. Still I couldn’t help but notice the difference in the environment.

Of course, there are never any absolute ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ decisions in these cases. Managers, leaders, and business owners must look out for all stakeholders, including customers, vendors, and all employees when evaluating what an employee can and can’t do or have in the workplace. The reason these decisions are so hard is because what is best for one might not be best for the other.

There are a ton of examples of these types of situations. Are flex hours acceptable? Can an employee hang personal pictures in their office space or should the look be consistent with the corporate image? Can a manager insist that an employee organize the unsightly piles of paperwork from a person’s desk? Can an employee work from home when they feel like it?

So how should a manager approach these tricky situations that involve a preference with an employee that may conflict with a traditional workplace environment?

Be genuinely open to what’s right for the business. When both parties can be focused on what’s best for the business objectives, it’s likely that everyone can live with the answer, even if it’s not what you wanted. And remember that the way it has always been done before is not the only measure of what’s right moving forward.
Establish a time period, where you’ll review and assess how it’s going. When trying something new, things will likely crop up that you didn’t anticipate. A pilot program sets the expectation that you’ll be testing it out, and gives everyone a mindset to objectively evaluate the successes and challenges of it. Talk about the fact that you may have to nix it all together, depending on the evaluation. Hope for the best, but think through what could go wrong so you can figure out how to prevent issues at all.
Be clear to everyone in the organization when and why any changes were made. If some employees are allowed to work in ways that appear unique or special, it will create resentment, unless you can state legitimate reasons that explain your rationale. Of course, you want to design policies that are fair. But fair can result in differences as well. For example, it may be completely appropriate to allow telecommuting for one job function but not another, based on the work itself and how that person(s) interacts with others. You can’t have a manufacturing worker conduct assembly line work from home, but you could have a data analyst work from a remote location without any issues.

We need to tap into ways that make the workplace more enjoyable to an employee, because it does impact productivity. But both the manager and the employee need to focus on what’s best for the organization when making the tough decisions. When the goals are clear and understood, the decisions become simple.

Enjoy lighter fare this Thanksgiving holiday

On November 23, 2011 / Graceful Leadership, Motivating / 7 Comments

I’m recommending lighter fare this Thanksgiving.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not talking about the amount of food you eat. Pile your plate up high with all the turkey, dressing, cranberry sauce, potatoes, and rolls that you want. Enjoy it all. I sure plan to.

I’m talking about making sure you find time to have some “lighter” moments to enjoy the holiday.

After indulging in the pumpkin pie, do whatever else makes you happy. Watch football. Play board games with family. Take a long walk outside. Read a book. Nap.

A whale of a time

On September 27, 2011 / Motivating / 6 Comments

In recent posts, I’ve talked about Gitte and Jill, both who inspired me by the choices they made about how they are living their lives. The subject of career choices comes up frequently in conversations I have with my work but I didn’t really expect this to be one of the main themes that resonated with me from my vacation.

While Grace was back in New Hampshire, sunning herself in a friend’s back yard and being entertained by chipmunks, Pete and I were exploring Alaska’s Inside Passage. One of main things that drew us to Alaska was the idea of the landscape and wildlife, so it was our hope to get out and experience it as much as possible. We enjoy kayaking here at home and felt like it would be a fitting way to see the coast there.

The power of liking lichen

On September 23, 2011 / Motivating / 6 Comments

I was taking pictures of Jill before I realized why. I was so drawn by her ability to make something ordinary, extraordinary. This Lichen Lady captivated my attention.

As the end of this week rolls around, it strikes me that I’ve had numerous conversations that focus on career choices. While at the grocery store late one afternoon, I ran into an old friend who told me her current work isn’t that rewarding and she is starting a process to figure out what she really wants to do. She asked if I could I help her.

And while having lunch with a colleague yesterday, he was telling me about the challenges in his son’s job search and the simple, yet wise, advice given to him by a high school counselor: “Find what you love to do, and do it.”

While in Alaska on our vacation, we found a few special people who had done just that. Jill, a New Englander by birth, had relocated to Alaska many years ago as part of her multiple cross-country moves that allowed her to work in forestry and conservation-related jobs. She also taught in schools along the way.

She gave us a guided nature tour alongside a river at the Kantishna Roadhouse, deep in Denali National Park. She and her husband live in Fairbanks year-round, but in the summers, she makes special arrangements to be in the Park.

I’ve never, ever, in my life been around anyone who liked lichen like Jill did!

You can see that everyone is actively learning, touching and smelling the lichen as Jill explains it to us. We were there at peak foliage season and even the plain, low-growing shrubs were beautiful.

Honestly, I could care less about lichen. I wouldn’t have even gone on this tour except the dog-sled demonstration was canceled because the person heading that up was ill that day. And while I love a good walk in the woods, I have absolutely no interest to learn more about lichen or spend time understanding the ins and outs of it. Until I met Jill.

Jill doesn’t just like lichen. She loves it. She understands it. She wants it be understood. She was serious about it. She showed us how there were 15 different types of lichens within a two-foot square radius. She also talked about the berries, the shrubs, the trees that supported the lichen. She made it light, interesting, engaging, and relevant. We were hanging on her every word. About lichen! It was cracking me up.

It proved to me that when someone brings complete energy and love for their work, it impacts everyone, even if they aren’t as passionate. As we were ending the tour, Jill said, “What I hope you leave with is this: knowing that the Alaskan tundra is very diverse.” She continued to add that when you think of cold climates and tundra conditions, you don’t think anything grows, but it does. And now I do remember that. I did absolutely learn about the region in a way that I would not have if it hadn’t been for her devotion to sharing it with us.

In our two weeks of touring Alaska, we had many guides. None of them were rude or unwelcoming. All of them shared information and were helpful. But just a select few were exceptional. When we were around one of those exceptional people, the memories lasted. The impact was obvious. These individuals loved what they did.

In addition to Gitte and Jill, there was another grand guide we had. You’ll meet him next time.

What does Grace have to do with any of this? Not much that I can come up with. I doubt Grace would care much about the lichen, but somehow I think Jill would make it enjoyable for her, too.

What is it that you love about your job?

Take your chores to the river

On September 20, 2011 / Motivating / 12 Comments

Gitte understands the importance of the little things in life and how to make the tough things easier. Or maybe she doesn't even view anything as tough. Just something that needs to be done, so why not enjoy it? The people who choose to live year-round in Alaska have this mindset that we could all benefit from.

There was one woman that we met on vacation that made a major impression on me. Her name is Gitte (pronounced Gee-ta), a Swedish woman who has lived in Alaska for the last 27 years. She was our guide during a 13-hour tour through Denali National Park. This particular tour took you into the park as far as you can drive, a 90-mile one way trip to the Kantishna Roadhousealong the park road. Gitte was a patient bus driver (when other drivers gave up on the potential for a bear or moose to come nearer, she savored the moment and we were rewarded with many close encounters), knowledgeable navigator, skilled wildlife-spotter, park expert, and fascinating person all rolled into one.

I could have listened to Gitte talk for hours about her life in the bush. It’s so different that anything I have known, could imagine, or even endure. Her husband (I think his name was Phil) was from Ohio and came to work at the park during his college years. (This is still very common; we met many students who had come to Alaska for seasonal employment and seeking adventure. Many go back home or to another exotic land; some return for several seasons, but hardly anyone stays over winter.)

Phil decided to take advantage of the then-homestead act in Alaska. The process was to find unclaimed land, stake it, and if you were the first to register it in the office at Fairbanks, it was yours. There were a few additional requirements: you had to build a minimum size structure and live on the land for a certain number of months during the year. He had lived there for several years when she met him.

When Gitte was telling us the story of him finding the place, she said, “He ended up in the middle of nowhere. Or depending on how you look at it, he ended up in the middle of everything.”

Gitte spotted this bear enjoying a dip in the river. Many buses passed us while she pulled off and watched where he might go next.

She definitely felt like they had everything. That was so appealing to me. She had keen awareness and unlimited appreciation for what the land and the experience offered her, despite the harshness of it. If things were demanding, she figured out to make them easier and more rewarding.

The bear seemed unaware, but definitely unconcerned, with the view of the bus, and we were delighted to see him advance in our direction.

She told fascinating stories of their life there for 19 years, raising four boys, in a small shelter, heated only by wood. When the third boy arrived, they doubled their space from the original 16’ x 16’ cabin. They saved their money, little by little, to buy one window each year to replace their plastic film windows. Windows in a climate that reaches 50 below zero on a daily basis seem like a necessity to me rather than a luxury, but not to them. They used their 16-dog sled team to transport the first window; one of the triple-pane elements broke from the jostling of the sled so the following year they decided to transport the window in their canoe. When the last of the four windows went in, they realized they no longer could hear the sounds of outdoors as they had before; it was bittersweet to give up the closeness to nature for the warmth that the windows provided.

We were all rewarded with Gitte's patience and her awareness that many things take time to develop.

She talked about meal preparation and home-schooling the boys (the two oldest are in college now in Fairbanks). Their routines changed with the seasons. In the summer, they moved to the coast, one primary objective was to avoid the mosquitoes. Their family, along with others, had a small camp area. During the day, she and the boys would pack up the dogs, meals, and laundry and head to the sand bars in the middle of the rock-strewn river bed. That area gave the boys and the dogs a place to exercise and play and she had access to water for laundry – and the mosquitoes were hardly around! But the thing that got me the most was this comment she made: “All the other families stayed at camp to do their chores and then they came down to the river late in the day to join us for dinner. I didn’t see any reason why I couldn’t take the chores to the river and enjoy the day there.”

Gitte is a person who understands how precious every moment is and that we make every moment what it is – good or bad. She wasn’t shirking her responsibilities. She didn’t avoid the hard things. This was her choice to live in the bush and understood the responsibility of that. She made it better for herself and for those in her life. We should all find ways to integrate our “chores” – whatever they may be – into every part of our day.

I think dogs have this ability, too. They don’t try to overcomplicate things. They enjoy the simple pleasures and they are always ready to enjoy life. Last night when we were in the kitchen longer than usual and thoughts started to drift about wanting to be reading or doing something other than what I was doing; and this morning when we rose while it was still dark, I thought of Gitte. We all have things we must do in our personal and professional lives that are less desirable than others. The people who choose to make Alaska their home understand how those pieces are necessary and fit into the larger picture of what they want and desire.

I will always need reminders of that but Gitte and Grace are there to help me.

Man’s Best Friend makes a great employee, too

On September 14, 2011 / Graceful Leadership, Motivating / 7 Comments

Muddy, an 8-year-old veteran at Denali, is named after one of the many rivers in the park. I loved her gorgeous rich chocolate-brown color. She is clearly enjoying the day prior to the demonstration and was one of the lucky ones chosen to show off her talents.

Hauling around a heavy load over miles of tough terrain in sub-zero temperatures doesn’t sound like it would be much fun. But I found out just how fun it can be – if you’re an Alaskan sled dog.

While on vacation the past two weeks, my husband and I toured through parts of Alaska. The vast scenery, composed of grand mountains, enormous glaciers, and abundant wildlife were always either in the foreground or background of what we saw. There was another theme: dogs.

The dogs are enjoying their rawhide reward for a job well done! Muddy, one of the lead dogs, prefers to bury her bone rather than chew it. We all have our ways to celebrate!

But these are not just any dogs, these are Alaskan sled dogs. They are bred to work. To endure cold temperatures. To provide transportation. And patrol a national park. These aren’t dogs that hang around in a sunbeam on the deck, which is one of Grace’s favorite activities in a day. These dogs work. And they love it.

One of our first stops was Denali National Park. Impressive in every way, Denali covers 6 million acres (roughly the size of the state of Massachusetts) and is open year-round to visitors. Denali National Park brings the hope of seeing its prize: the peaks of Mount McKinley, the highest in all of North America, are usually covered by clouds. It also lures you with anticipation of what type of wildlife you might glimpse next. A grizzly? Caribou? Dall’s sheep? Moose? We saw all of that—and up close. But I was drawn to the dogs. Denali is the only national park in America with a working kennel and these sled dogs perform essential wintertime duties. In the summertime, they greet park visitors like us.

We met the 30+ dogs as they slumbered in the summer sun; maybe Grace could be a seasonal guest? Upon closer inspection of their duties, we decided Grace is better off in her cushy bean bag bed. Winters can be extremely cold with temperatures ranging from 40-below to 20-above zero on warm days. New England snow storms start to look mild in comparison.

In Denali, these four-legged national park employees go where machine can not go in the harsh weather of Alaskan winters. The dogs are entrusted with a number of responsibilities, including accessing winter visitors, hauling supplies, transporting wildlife researchers, and helping insure that there are not illegal activities happening within the park, such as poaching or snow machines entering into the wilderness area. They retire around the age of nine, and have covered approximately 8,000 patrol miles during their tenure.

We saw a demonstration with five dogs pulling a sled. As we listened to the park ranger talk about the care and work of the dogs, the dogs were nearby, seeming to have not an inkling of interest. But at some cue—I have no idea what it was but they sure did—every one of the 30 dogs leaped to attention, barking, howling, jumping, singing, all in harmony yelling to the rangers: “PICK ME!!!!”

It was hysterical to see them come to life, in such sharp contrast from a relaxed state to one of intense anticipation. They knew the demonstration was about to begin and they were also keenly aware from experience that only a few were selected each day. They wanted to work. They want to show off their skills and talents. And they wanted that enormous rawhide treat waiting for them afterwards. These park rangers knew how to motivate their team.

We saw Denali during peak foliage -- it was gorgeous. You can see the moose about mid-way back, just before the treeline, if you look closely. Imagine covering this terrain in heavy snow and freezing temperatures! But the dogs love it.

First, the rangers chose the individual dogs carefully, noting the mix of the team and their abilities individually and combined. They were also setting up important training and mentoring for each of the dogs, not wasting this “demo” but giving it meaning by offering a learning opportunity with it. The rangers let the dogs have fun—allowing them to do what they do best—pull that sled. And then they praised and rewarded when the performance hit the mark.

These rangers are proud of their husky employees. And the employees are proud to serve. It’s a mutually good working relationship, one that models good lessons for all of us at work every day.

The next time you have a task that seems like drudgery, how can you make it fun?

I’ll take a frog, please!

On July 12, 2011 / Graceful Leadership, Motivating / Leave a comment

Being in water is not something that Grace is fond of. But she's on the hunt for a frog and this would motivate her much more than a piece of cheese, one of her favorite treats, to get on the rocks as you see her here. It's all a matter of what motivates us to do things we may not otherwise want to do!

At this morning’s Rotary meeting, our guest speaker was a dog trainer. It seems everywhere I turn these days I’m around some dog and/or animal-related activity, which makes me very happy. And I didn’t even have anything to do with arranging for the speaker!

Denise Mazzola gave a compelling presentation about a trip she made last fall, driving from Texas to New Hampshire in a small van, bringing back with her 22 homeless dogs. It was an amazing story and kudos to Denise for her extraordinary measures to save these precious animals and give them the opportunity to find permanent homes. (All were adopted!)

The impetus for this trip came as a result of Denise’s acceptance to an Extreme Mutt Makeover contest. The purpose of the event is to showcase shelter dogs – raising awareness that shelter dogs can be healthy, well-adjusted pets, and reducing any perception that these animals all have behavioral issues or insurmountable problems.

As part of this event, certified dog trainers spend eight weeks with a dog, teaching them basic obedience skills and preparing them for life with an adopted family. Denise was paired with Mustang Sally, a Catahula Leapard mix; Denise said that Sally was one of the most difficult dogs she had ever trained. Coming from a veteran trainer, that’s quite a statement.

If you only have a short period of time to show measurable results, you need to find strong motivators. Denise really needed to get to know Sally—fast—and understand what motivates her to success. Because Sally was not overly motivated by food, something that makes training easier, Denise had a harder job. And as she told us this morning, “It’s all about the motivation when you’re trying to change behavior.”

So of course, that got me thinking. That’s such a true statement for any person. Whenever we do something, we’re motivated by some reason. And if the task or behavior is less desirable for us, we need a more intense motivator. Wouldn’t you agree?

Our friends

In the workplace, managers and executives are often trying to find ways to motivate employees to top performance. Or sometimes we just want to give a gift that says, “thank you for an outstanding job.” Frequently we offer the other person something that we value, as opposed to finding out what’s important to the other person. One common example is when sales organizations give incentive trips to exotic destinations for exceptional sales results. Even though many salespeople are social by nature it doesn’t automatically mean they want to go on a trip to the islands with their boss!

So when we are setting up benefits, incentives, rewards, and even simple gifts to say ‘thank you for a great job’, remember to think about the other person. The most important thing is what motivates that person. Not you. Involve the other individual in the conversation or you will likely miss the opportunity to find the real incentive.

Grace, unlike Mustang Sally, is very motivated by food. But if I am interested to get Grace to dip her toes in the water, the only thing that will entice her is a frog. Not even cheese, one of her favorite treats, would be enough. Get to know the other person so you’ll know what motivates them. Or if you can, ask.

Lazy dog daze of summer

On July 6, 2011 / Managing, Motivating / 5 Comments

What else is there to do on a nice day but to hang out in the grass with a meaty bone?

In New England, there are only a few weeks of warm, sunny weather in the summer – if you’re lucky. So when the sun is out and the temperatures are perfect, it’s wise to take advantage of it. The last week or so has been that kind of weather. Temperatures have been ideal, the sun has been shining, it’s past-season for black flies and apparently a little too dry for mosquitoes. What a miracle – no bugs!! Only the occasional short thunderstorm during a late afternoon has come through to interrupt our beautiful days.

Summer is the time to enjoy and rejuvenate. We all need to take a break from our whirlwind, and while having perfect weather shouldn’t be a requirement for when you get away from your routines, it’s an excellent reminder. Even if you take five minutes or perhaps five hours – go ahead, make it five days! – do make sure to take time for yourself. Find something that makes you happy. When you return to your work, others will notice the difference, and you will, too.

Talents worthy of recognition

On June 21, 2011 / Graceful Leadership, Motivating / 15 Comments

It’s been said that the most effective form of motivation is recognition. It is all too often in our corporate world that employees feel underappreciated. Sometimes I hear from a manager, “Well, that’s their job. Do I have to say thank you for things that are expected out of them?”

Grace is the perfect reminder. Any good dog trainer will tell you that positive reinforcement is the best way to teach a dog. Because of Grace’s sensitive and nervous nature, it is especially true. A vet once told me, “Catch her doing something right and prevent her from doing something wrong.”

We all know it feels good to get a simple ‘thank you’ but it’s also an effective way to give feedback. What better way to encourage continued behavior by being clear about what you like. Blogging offers the ideal forum to provide that feedback—leaving comments on a blog post is a quick and informal way to share an idea or question. I love it when people comment and it’s the same for employees who crave feedback (but don’t always receive it).

It is particularly gratifying when you’ve worked hard at something – even if it’s something you do as part of your job—when someone shows their appreciation. And that’s what I experienced this past week when a fellow blogging buddy from England selected Graceful Leadership as a recipient of the Versatile Blogger’s Award.

I couldn’t find the origins of the Versatile Blogger’s Award, nor the criteria for receiving it. Given the name, one would assume you need to be versatile. But it seems that it’s more about one blogger being able to give a public shout out to a blogger that they appreciate. If you receive this award, you’re asked to nominate 15 other blogs and tell seven facts about yourself. That seems somewhat arbitrary to me, so I’m going to bend the rules a bit. (Hey, what better way to be versatile, right?) I’d like to tell you about a few blogs, without focusing on the exact number. These bloggers are very different, but they have one thing in common: they understand the importance of recognition and feedback.

When I started this blog about four months ago, I had no idea of the amazing connections I would make, nor the wealth of information I would find. I read a lot of blogs and now subscribe to 21 blogs (I only know that because I counted them as a result of getting this award), and I am constantly entertained, educated, and enthralled by the talents of people who put their energy into sharing their experiences.

All the blogs I read reflect my personal and professional interests: dogs, animals, healthcare, patient safety, marketing, organizational development and coaching, food, knitting, and photography (I love beautiful images, especially landscapes and people; I have no talents as a photographer myself). Many are intended to be solely educational, others are entertaining, and some are both.

One of the first blogs I found [via Twitter] was my little dog, written by a witty whippet owner, Didi. Tales of this regal and beautiful whippet, George, are humorous and intelligent and Didi has a real knack for connecting with people through her astute observations. George and Grace have lots of the same behavioral tendencies and this strengthens our bond. Didi was the one who bestowed the Versatile Blogger Award upon me and Grace; it’s not surprising given that I’ve come to feel like she’s a very good friend, despite separated by thousands of miles and having never met.

I’ve found scores of other blogs from numerous sources; some are fans of Didi and George, too. Sara who writes about lifewith4cats, is incredibly entertaining, but the thing that strikes me the most is her honesty. Her authentic person shines in her blog, and I really admire that. Pictures, especially of animals and nature are compelling to me, but at Spiderpaw, Lionel’s stories enrich his artistry.

There a few other dog-related blogs in my repertoire. Live, Bark, Love is written by a recent college grad (a fellow Hokie but I discovered we both went to Virginia Tech after becoming hooked on her blog about her four lovable dogs) and The Organic Hound, a company founded by women devoted to healthy living for dogs.

Last, but not least, are two other blogs: one on food and one about organizational development. If you decide to check them out, you’ll see their expertise coming through in their respective subject. Rufus’ Food and Spirits Guide offers simple recipes for the most amazing dishes. There are lots of things that I prefer to do more than cooking, but this blog can’t help but whet your appetite. Charney Coaching and Consulting is a trusted source for organizational development topics.

These particular blogs stand out because the authors have passion and competence for their topics, but they also understand the value of building relationships. I know if I met them in a workplace, they would be the type of leader who offered frequent, constructive feedback. That’s worthy of recognition.

Making the most out of what you have

On May 31, 2011 / Graceful Leadership, Motivating / 8 Comments

Resting her head, she was quiet enough to be napping!

There are lots of times when we expose Grace to new experiences. Of course some she enjoys more than others. We took her kayaking several times last year, and she tolerated it, but it was clear that she prefers land over water.

She does have a bit of a smirk here, but she was annoyed at the fly who kept buzzing her. I put the towel over her to keep the sun from baking on her too long. She loves her sunbeams, but it did get hot at times.

This past weekend, we went out again. This trip was different. I got this sense from her that, while she wasn’t totally comfortable with the whole ‘this-boat-rocks-too-much’ feeling, she had resolved to make the most of it. She limited her whining (thank you, Grace) and settled in to observe our surroundings. Her gaze followed the flying birds overhead and the grazing turkey on the shore. When we stopped to listen to the fish smack on bugs, she feigned interest, too.

We stopped after an hour or so and all made way to a wooded area to have our sandwich (she got treats, too) and she was able to stretch her legs while chasing a chipmunk or two. How bad can a day be when you get to do that? She found ways to incorporate her favorite activities into the excursion.

Ahhh, enjoying the ride!

Grace offered good advice for all of us from this trip. Go with the flow. Roll with the punches. Find things you enjoy even when you’re asked to do things you don’t always want to do.

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