Behavior begins with your thoughts
Instinct. That’s what everyone said was the reason Grace acted so differently than I expected last week when she darted after that innocent bunny.
She and I were worlds apart. But it was just her instinct to chase and mine to protect.
I thought a lot about that incident in relation to people in the workplace. I’ve been working with a person on a project recently and she approaches the work very differently than I would. Her way is not wrong. But it can easily irritate me because it takes more effort and time to get things done.
While on my walks with Grace recently, I spent some of time thinking about how to view the situation through her lens. I know she and I are trying to accomplish the same thing and I also know that we have very similar beliefs about the project. So it should be going seamlessly. But it’s not. Ever been in that situation?
Today, I realized that she and I are about as far away as Grace and I were on how we’d welcome a rabbit into our neighborhood.
In spite of my sadness and horror, I found a way to understand Grace and her motives last week, now I felt like I had the capacity to figure out what was going on with this person causing me some angst. And just that shift — to honestly, and seriously, try to understand her, made a complete difference. Now I can see that over the past few weeks, I told myself I was trying, but I really wasn’t. Instead of being open, my thoughts had kept returning to my frustration. What I was really trying to do was figure out a way for her to see my way.
But when I felt that shift today, it was like a huge weight had been lifted. But even more than that, I found that I could allow her methods to easily enter into the process, while at the same time being able to voice my own thoughts, very clearly and openly. And none of it felt heavy or charged with emotion. It was balanced.
Once again, Grace helped me think through a situation that happened to us, and it helped me apply it to a new context.
Shift your thoughts and your behavior will change, too.
Now if only Oliver and Grace would listen to me.